A Day In The Life Of Emmett Cullen
by Chibidarknekoangel
Summary: The fun awsome life...death thingy of Emmett Cullen. I suck at summaries. 3rd chapter is now up please, please read! Emmett get's himself in BIG trouble.Reveiw! i love reading them
1. Controllers or Paddles?

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight nor New Moon

A Day In The Life Of…Emmett.

3:56am

"DAMN, DAMN, DAMN IT!!!!" I yelled stomping my feet on to the flooring.

I could hear foot steps hurrying up the steps then my door swung opened. It was Jasper.

"What's wrong with you?" He asked, clearly annoyed by my stomping.

" I…can't…beat...sephiroth…must kill him!" I said, as I frantically as I bit the paddle.

Jasper raised and eyes brow, then realizing I was still playing Final Fantasy 8, slowly shook his head.

"You have Issues man…."

"GRRRR! I don't have Issues!" I snared back, accidentally braking my stupid paddle.

Jasper chucked, " You have Issues with tissues!" he said as her waved his hands in the air.

I gave him a dark evil glare and got up to get another paddle.

"Aw, you broke your Controller?" Jasper asked , tiling his head to the right.

I sighed as I searched threw my closet.

"Duh, err…can I use your paddle?" I asked, as my hope was dying of ever finding my other paddle.

"My what? " He asked me, clearly puzzled.

"Your Paddle…."I said, giving him the; Are you stupid look.

"Oh, you mean Controller, right?" He asked a grin growing on his face.

"They're called paddles, Jasper." I told him with a proud; I know it and you didn't tone.

"No, it's controller" He said in a; my IQ is higher then yours so stick a juice box and suck it way.

"NO…"my voice was growing into a shout. "It's paddle."

"Nooo!" he matched my tone. "It's Controller!" He hissed back at me.

The argument carried on for several more minutes.

" PADDLE, PADDLE, PADDLE!" I was shouting banging my large feet on the ground.

"CONTROLLER, CONTROLLER , CONTROLLER!" he shouted back, again making sure to match my tone.

"That's it!" I yelled as I attacked him.

We fought on the floor for several minutes, we we're biting, kicking, and punching.

Then suddenly my door swung open. Jasper and I both jump with a jolt at emptily looked to the door, where a dark shape stood…it was Alice.

"What in the world are you two doing?" She asked amazed by are positions.

I jumped to my feet. "ALICE!" I yelled happy to see her.

Alice face seemed both worried and scared. "Yes?"

"Aren't they called Paddles!?" I yelled again.

Jasper stood and brushed himself off. "Alice, Please tell him they're called Play station CONTROLLERS." He said giving her a fast smile.

Alice Smiled back and nodded. "Yup, that's what I call them!"

I stumped my feet furiously.

"Err. Do you HAVE to be on HIS side? " I said clenching my teeth together.

"What is this all about anyway?" Alice Asked.

"Well," Jasper explained about my tempter tantrum and are perverse conversion.

"Oh!" Alice exclaimed. "Well yeah Emmett, Jasper IS right."

I stood there for a moment with my pouty face and thought.

"ROSE!" I wined dashing out the room towards my beloved's room.

I could hear Jasper and Alice's laughs. I opened Rosalie's door. She was sitting at her night stand brushing long golden hair. I paused for a moment and thought weather she could have heard us all the way down the hall. Before I could ask she answer.

"I heard and I call them paddles." She said not looking away from her beautiful refection.

I grinned a huge grin. "Thank you Rose." I said then dash out the door to Carlisle study.

Jasper and Alice had already beat me to the study they we're standing out side the door waiting for me, no doubt Alice already had foreseen what Rosalie said and she knew I would come here next.

I opened the door to Carlisle Study. Carlisle was bent over a new book, then he looked up at us.

"Oh, hello." He smiled

I walked in the room followed by Alice then Jasper.

"Aren't they called paddles?" I asked.

A puzzled Carlisle stared at all three of us.

"We're debating on whether they're play station controllers or play station paddles." She explained.

"Jasper and Alice THINKS they're Controllers, But me and Rosalie KNOW it's paddles." I added, smiling wide.

"Oh," Carlisle repealed clearly not interested.

"Well…"Jasper started. " What do you say?"

Carlisle started to read his book again his eyes following words around the page.

"I say, you all play video games too much…when I was a kid we didn't have video games." He answered.

"You also didn't have hygiene." Alice muttered then giggled.

Carlisle glared at Alice then laughed." Yes…maybe so…."

I sighed. " Well let's go ask…"

"She's not going to give us answer either." Alice Interrupted me with her vision of the future.

I thought for a second.

"…Where's Edward?" I ask noticing he was missing.

Alice smiled. "Bella's house, duh."

Without another word I run down stairs and out the door.


	2. Are you a Virgen?

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight nor New Moon…but if I did, I would stalk Edward Cullen…

And at random times and moments I would pop out of nowhere and yell. "TAKE MEH!"….so maybe it's best that way….

Anyway….Last on A day in the life of Emmett.

"…_Where's Edward?" I ask noticing he was missing._

_Alice smiled. "Bella's house, duh."_

_Without another word I run down stairs and out the door._

4:17 Am

I reached Bella's house in less than 3 minutes. I stared at the still, dark house.

And that's when I realized…I never been inside Bella's house. This was a problem because, I didn't know where Bella's room was, and that met I didn't know where Edward was…damn…

I looked around and notice the tall tree that was next to the house…if I claimed up it…I could get a look inside. I grinned at the idea, I run to the tree and climbed it effortlessly. I sat on the one of the branches and to my surprise there Edward was staring at me threw the window. He must have heard my thoughts of climbing the tree. I waved to him.

"Hi! Edward!" I shouted happily, still waving.

Edwards face, was at first angry then worried, he turned and for a few minutes we stayed quit. Then he opened the window with out a sound.

"What are you doing here?" He said in a load anger whisper.

"Move, I'm coming in." I told him still in my normal voice.

"Shh…go home!" He scowled at me, in a whisper.

I jumped to the window sill and pushed pass him (with ease) as I entered the room. I still had a huge grin on my face as I looked around the room. Wow this was where Bella lived. And there in the middle of the room was the bed holding the human girl Edward had fallen for.

"What do you want!?" He hissed at me still in a whisper.

"So she's asleep?" I asked curiously, grinning still as I stalked over to Bella.

"Yes and I'm trying to keep it that way!" He hissed again annoyed.

I walked over to the side of the bed to get a better look, she was lying on her back, her right arm was under the blankets and her left arm across her chest, I held back my laugh. She looked like she was about to randomly start rapping in her sleep, my eyes moved up to her face, her eyes; still closed was covered by her hair chestnut brown hair and then I notice her mouth, hanging wide open and some drool rolling down her cheek. I cover my mouth trying so hard to hold the laugh in a few chuckles escaped.

"D-does-does she-she do-o this often?" I asked, struggling to hold my laugh.

I glanced at Edward, he face both anger and embarrassed for he's poor Bella.

"Sometimes." He admitted. Lowering he's head.

I couldn't help the other chuckles; I tried to get control as I put my finger under Bella's chin. I tried to close her mouth, but when I did; her mouth just fell open again. After that I couldn't help myself I started cracking up laughing. Edward was next to me in a flash covering my mouth. We both got quit; we both listened as Charlie (Bella's dad) rolled over in his bed in the next room and went back to making his buzz of a snore. Edward slowly let go of my mouth and then the idea popped in my head.

"Hello, Edward." I said in my best girly voice, as I moved Bella's chin up and down.

Edward coved his mouth trying, not to laugh.

"Are you still a virgin?" I made the unconscious Bella Ask.

Edward's face became hard and plan.

"Get out." He said in an emotionless tone.

"DO ME, DO ME!" I made Bella beg.

"Stop that!" He hissed in a loud whisper, as he grabs my wrist.

"Ok, ok" I said with a small chuckle, and then I walk over to the rocking chair and sat.

Edward then waped Bella's cheek off, and turned to me.

"Now, what did you want?" He said threw his teeth clearly pissed at me.

"Oh, yeah." I chuckled. "Jasper and I are having an agreement." I explained.

Edward cross his arms over his chest and tapped his foot.

"And I care why?" He asked in an annoyed tone.

"Well, are they called Play station controllers or Play station paddles?" I asked him worried for the answer.

Edward closed his eyes and shook he's head back and forth, probably seeing me and Jasper fight that I replayed in my head. He took in a long breathe in then slowly breathed it out.

"I am sorry Emmett."-He said calmly and slowly-"But they ARE called Play Station Controllers."

_WHAT!? _I thought. Edward nodded.

"Yup…that's how they identified them on X-play." He acknowledged me.

"Oh…" was all I could say, I was so disappointed. How could I argue with X-play?

_Are you sure? _I thought to Edward. He just nodded with a smirk on his lips.

"Positive." -He said smirking still, with he eyes still closed-"Now…maybe you should go home." He said opening both eyes.

I sigh again. I didn't want to go home and admit defeat.

Maybe…I didn't have too.


	3. Hide and Brake

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight nor New Moon but if I did…I would lock Jacob Black in a broom closet and have my OWN fun. So maybe it's best.

Anyway...Last on A day in the life of Emmett.

_Are you sure? I thought to Edward. He just nodded with a smirk on his lips. _

"_Positive." -He said smirking still, with he eyes still closed-"Now…maybe you should go home." He said opening both eyes._

_I sighed again. I didn't want to go home and admit defeat. _

_Maybe…I didn't have too._

4:22am

I opened the door to the house and walked in at a normal speed. I turned and closed the door be hide me. When I turned around Alice and Jasper both stood be hide me. Alice smiled at me then hugged me.

"It's ok Emmett; I know that you must be disappointed." She must of foreseen Edwards answer. I just hoped she didn't foresee my evil plain.

"Disappointed?" I ask in a mystified way.

I tried hard not to really FEEL disappointed, because if Jasper picked up the feeling he'd know what I was up too. Instead I tried feeling confused. Jasper did seem to be getting my confusion feeling, I could tell by his puzzled face.

"Yes, that they're called Play station Controllers and not Paddles." said an also confused Alice.

I wanted to laugh, but I would blow it if I did.

"…what are you talking about Alice? I said that they were called Controllers…Jasper and you said Paddles…so why would I be disappointed?"

I was tying so hard to keep my face and my emotions from giving away my efforts of reverse psychology. The two stared at me with concerned looks then looked at each other.

These were times I wished I could have Edwards ability. Alice and Jasper turned back to me. I was trying to give them an Edward serious face…but it looked more like Bella's face, when Alice told Bella that she was her favorite shopping partner. I think this was the point Jasper started to feel my worry.

"Oh, really?" He said folding his arms over his chest. I smirk going on his face.

I nodded. "It's ok Jasper I know it's hard to be wrong, but im like the three wise men only…I'm…one?"

Alice started to crack up laughing at me, and then Jasper joined in.

Just then Esme entered the room.

"Now what's going on here?" she asked in her motherly voice.

"Nothing, Jasper can I use your…controller?"

Jasper was still laughing he just nodded. Esme looked confused by Alice and Jaspers laughing fits. I just ran upstairs and grabs Jasper controller from his room the ran to mine. I didn't want to wait any longer to get my victory.

_5 hours later and 30 minutes 10:52am_

After a few hours of losing to the evil, dark, angel. I decided to go have some fun with my lovely wife. I slowly opened my door after shutting of my Ps2. I walked down the hall to Rosalie's room. I slowly opened the door, and discovered she was now stands looking at her reflection from all the angles she could. She was wearing a beautiful, low cut shirt with matching jean and black boots.

"Hi, honey." I said with a sweet puppy dog face.

"Oh!" she said surprised, she properly was to concerned about the way she looked to even notice me coming in.

"I love you…."I said to her as I opened my arms for her.

She smiled and walks over to me.

"I love you too…Emmett dear." she said as she let me wrap her in my arms.

I really did love her….more the anything. She was my sun on a rainy day. I would do anything for her and I know she would for me.

"You know what im in the mood for." I asked her in a teasing voice.

It took her a second then she got the message.

"Oh, Emmett no I just finish getting ready for the day…"she complained.

"But sweet heart…"

"No, maybe later this evening." She promised.

I sighed. "What do I do until then?" I asked.

She sat back down at her night stand to touch up her make up.

"Well…." She grinned. "Would you like to play hide and Seek?" she asked.

"Sure, just me and you?" I wasn't excited over the idea, but it was something to do.

"Yes, and if I find you…maybe you could have your way with me." She said still grinning.

Now I was excited.

"Alright!" I ran out the door and stood there for a minute.

_Where to hide?_ I thought. _Humm_ _Edwards room! Perfect!_

I ran to Edwards's room, I slowly opened the door with out a noise and went in closing it without a peep. Rose wouldn't think to look in here right away, because I wasn't aloud in here.

Ever since I broke Edward's 7th stereo. He had this hole. 'You're Not allowed in my room' rule thing. I sat on his couch and waited for my rose to find me. I hoped it was soon, I didn't want Edward coming home with Bella when Me and Rose be having are fun. Even throw…I would love to see Bella's face. I chuckle at the thought.

I waited for a few minutes. I stood up and paced a little.

_Come on Rose…_I thought. _It's not hard to find me._

I waited a few more minutes then I walk to the door. I opened it and looked down the hall…emptily. I closed the door and took a few steps back before turning and running into Edward's brand new stereo. The stereo tumbled over itself the fell onto the floor making a huge crashing notice. I was so shocked that I did something THAT stupid that I couldn't move from my spot.

"Damn…" was the only thing that I could think to say.


End file.
